Seven Minutes in Heaven
by EveKnight75
Summary: At Lucy Winters' birthday party, Jan and Peter are stuck together in the closet as a cruel joke during the game Seven Minutes in Heaven. ONESHOT. Bradycest. JanPeter. Further explanation of rating inside.


Disclaimer: I do not own the Brady Bunch. Everyone knows that. I'm not making any money off of this. You ought to know that because you're reading this for free. This one-shot is based on the episode "Will the Real Jan Brady Please Stand Up?" I own Lisa and Elise.

Author's Notes: Events occur after episode ends. Thoughts in italics. Bradycest involved. Suggestive scenes may be considered mildly graphic. Hints at sex between minors. Don't read if incestuous sexual activity between minors or any variation of the sort offends you.

* * *

Lucy Winter's party had been dull so far. After Lucy and Peter had managed to convince Jan to return to the party, nothing exciting had happened at the actual party itself. Jan stood by the punch bowl, eying everyone around her. No one had approached her because they thought that she might still be a little sensitive about the wig incident. She wasn't bothered by the wig incident anymore, but she was still pissed off at Lucy for sending her invitation to Marcia. 

_Maybe this time she'll bother to remember my name. It looks like I was the only life in this drag-fest anyway._

Jan eyed Lucy from the snack table with a little smirk on her face. Lucy was making desperate attempts to get the party started. She put on some lively dance music and kept asking one of the boys to dance with her, but he kept turning her down. Jan's smirk grew a little wider and she followed Lucy's train of sight after the boy. Her smirk disappeared as her gaze stopped on Peter and Margie Whipple. Margie was showing Peter off to a group of people and chatting away happily, oblivious to their snickers. Peter was blushing and trying to pry Margie's arm off of him so he could escape from her. It was to no avail - the goofy-looking girl had a grip that would make Superman whimper like a little boy.

Jan's anger evaporated into pity. Peter was the only sibling who hadn't laughed at her when he first saw her wig. He was the one who had explained to the others at the door that the wig wasn't a joke when they laughed at her. He had run after her all the way home when she fled in tears. When he burst through the door, he didn't give her phrases of pity or yell at her in anger. He simply asked, "Why'd you run off like that? I could've walked you home."

Right now, Peter was one of the few people she wasn't upset with. Lucy's behavior towards her was aloof before and after the time she had dragged Jan back to her house. _She only did it because it would appear rude if she didn't_. The other four siblings had laughed at her and insulted her. Her parents and Alice kept approaching her with hesitation, which was enough to tell her how they truly felt. She honestly didn't want their pity and false understanding. It was all she could do not to lash out at her mother's saccharine tone in front of Lucy and Margie.

She didn't realize that she had stared off into space towards Peter's direction. Peter had felt her gaze, and was now looking at Jan from across the room and was pleading with his gaze for her to help him. Jan snapped out of her trance and answered his look with a wince and a mild shrug then sipped her punch. She wanted to help Peter - she truly did - but there was no solution coming to mind at the moment. Her gaze swept across Lucy again. This time, Lucy was with two other girls, and all three were giggling over two hats with a bunch of paper slips in each. One was a man's derby and the other was a small veiled hat. Both were the same size.

Jan's frown returned to her face. She inconspicuously made her way over to the giggling trio while morphing her features from a frown to a smile. "Hey Lucy!"

Lucy gave a little shriek and turned around abruptly to face Jan. "Oh, hi Jan." Jan kept the grin pasted on. She was getting tired of false enthusiasm from Lucy. It was obvious that Lucy didn't want Jan to be there at the moment.

Jan didn't care. "So what are you girls giggling about?" Grin still in place.

One of the other girls didn't recognize Jan without the wig and started blabbing. "We're going to play Seven Minutes in Heaven. Perfect for a thirteenth birthday, don't ya think?" She leaned closer to Jan, pointed in the direction of Peter and Margie, then whispered conspiratorially, "You see those two over there? They're gonna be locked in the closet first. That really ought to liven things up!" She continued giggling and failed to notice the lightening-quick scowl that passed over Jan's face. Jan had a closed-mouth smile back on her face by the time she had leaned away.

"You're right, it would be a funny joke." She hesitated for effect. "But I've seen that girl dragging that guy around ever since the party began. He's embarrassed enough as it is. Are you sure you want to make him angry to boot?"

The girl frowned a bit. Elise may be a bit of a ditz, but she wasn't cruel. The other girl had recognized Jan and a small smile crept over her face. "You're right - that would be crossing the line. We won't do it. But we're still playing the game. Groovy?"

"Groovy." Jan smiled back at Lisa, genuinely this time. Her work had been done. At least she had done one little thing to help Peter get away from Margie. She'd have to formulate the rest later, so she could keep Margie away. Peter wasn't keeping a score card, but after all the times he had been nice to her throughout the wig incident, she felt that she had to do extra for him. It wouldn't feel right to her otherwise.

As Jan walked away to send Peter her silent rescue message, Lucy hissed to her friend, "What was that for?"

Lisa just gave a devious smile and replied, "You'll see. Why don't you two get some ice from the kitchen? We'll start the game once the ice is on the table."

A gleam of recognition entered Lucy's eyes. She stood up and directed Elise into the kitchen.

* * *

The ice had been set on the table. Jan was standing in one corner of the room with a punch glass in her hand. Peter was still in Margie's grip, also with a punch glass in his hand. Both had been drinking fruit punch non-stop since the party began - Jan because of her lack of conversation, and Peter to concentrate on something other than Margie. 

Lucy was in the front hallway next to the walk-in coat closet. "May I have your attention, please?" The crowd settled down and looked at Lucy. "We're going to spice things up with a little game called Seven Minutes in Heaven." She gestured to the coat closet. "A boy's name and a girl's name will be picked out of the hats next to me. The two people called up will go into the closet for seven minutes. Just to make sure they stay in there, the closet will be locked from the outside. If the boy and girl both raise objections, then they will be forced to spend an extra eleven minutes in the closet together."

Peter shot a look of panic towards Jan, but she returned it with a look of reassurance. Peter calmed down - apparently Jan had factored this into her rescue plan.

Lisa was standing next to Lucy with a hat in each hand. Elise was standing by the record player and had put on romantic music. "Any questions?"

One girl timidly called out, "What are we supposed to do in the closet?" She blushed as the others around her started to giggle. "Oh," she whispered. "I get it now."

"Any other questions?" No one spoke up. "Then let's begin. The first people to go into the closet will be... Peter Brady and... Jan Brady!"

Peter and Jan's heads shot up in shock, and they whipped around to look at each other with equal expressions of panic. Jan hadn't expected that!

A series of murmurs rolled around the room. Peter snatched his arm out of Margie's slack grip and marched towards the front while Jan did the same from her corner of the room. Once they stepped into the front hallway, Jan sputtered, "We can't do that! We're siblings!"

Lisa retorted, "**Step**-siblings. And only for two years. That makes it all right."

"No it doesn't!" Peter argued. "We live under the same roof!"

"Yes it does!"

Lucy interrupted at this point. "That's enough! How about this: I'll pull out one more name randomly from the girls' hat, because there are more girls at this party. You can choose to enter the closet with that girl. If you'd rather choose Jan, then the two of you will be stuck in the closet for 18 minutes because you both objected. Is that fair?"

Peter couldn't argue with that. Jan's eyes darkened in anger. Lucy wouldn't have offered an alternative if she didn't have a back-up plan.

"All right, Peter. You can either choose Jan or... Margie Whipple."

Peter's eyes flashed dangerously and he looked at Jan for permission. He received an imperceptible nod in return.

"I choose Jan."

Peter didn't notice the look of disappointment cross Margie's face. She had finally gotten the hint. No one in the room said anything. They weren't exactly surprised with his decision, considering his options.

Lucy grinned. This plan was even more devious than the first one, and it had worked. When the rumors get around school on Monday, the Brady name would be tarnished.

"Are you going to open the closet for us or not?". Jan broke through Lucy's thoughts.

"Huh? Of course, sorry about that."

Jan and Peter grumbled under their breath as they walked past her into the closet. Once they were in, Lucy locked the doors and stepped away from the closet. She started her stopwatch. "Your time begins now!"

* * *

The moment the clock began ticking, Jan started to apologize. "I'm so sorry, Peter. I never meant for this to happen." 

"You mean you knew about this!"

"Of course not! I found out that Lucy and her friends were planning to put you in here with Margie. I made them promise they wouldn't. I had no idea that they would use me in their prank instead. I'm so sorry, I really..." Jan started hyperventilating at this point.

Peter grabbed her shoulders. "Jan, look at me. This is not your fault. You were only trying to help me. Lucy's a bitch."

Jan suddenly looked up at him. "Peter!"

"We both know she is. And it's not like she can hear us." A smirk slowly played across Peter's dark features.

"How about we get a little revenge?"

Jan recognized that tone. "And how do you propose we do that?" Jan's mischief streak matched Peter's own.

"Play the game for real. Make her own prank backfire on her."

"Genius. Why don't we up the stakes a little? Really make Lucy think twice before she tries to pull one over on us again?"

Peter just looked at her a little confused. Jan smirked and pulled his jacket off his shoulders than began to unbutton his shirt. Peter looked shocked at first, then smirked back and started to unzip the back of Jan's dress. His hands reached her shoulders then hesitated.

"Only the underwear doesn't come off. We're step-siblings now. It's OK."

Peter gulped, then pulled Jan's dress down until it pooled to the floor. She was wearing a white training bra and white panties under her stockings. Peter pulled the stockings off too.

Jan had gotten Peter's shirt off and was attempting to undo the knot in his tie. She grunted in frustration.

Peter pulled Jan's hands down to the button in his dress pants. "Save the tie for later." Jan undid his pants and pulled them down. Peter stepped out the pants and kicked them to the side.

"Two minutes are up!" Lucy yelled from the distance. Both of them looked up for a quick second. Jan simply pulled the tie off without undoing the knot. "Hair," he whispered urgently. Her fingers flew up to Peter's hair and started playing with it. Peter's fingers tangled themselves in Jan's blond tresses and started doing the same.

"Five minutes up!" Another yell from the distance.

"Lips!" Jan nearly panted. She licked her lips, then started pursing them together, as if trying to even lipstick. Peter gasped at the sight of Jan's tongue flicking out to lick her lips, but then regained enough of his senses to imitate her lip movements.

"Seven minutes have passed!"

Jan and Peter stopped pressing their lips together. Jan let out a gasp. "My lips hurt."

"So do mine."

"But they're still not swollen enough. What do we do?"

The sight of Jan's disheveled hair, heaving chest, and flushed cheekbones was getting to be too much for Peter's hormones.

"Can I kiss you?" _Where had _that_ come from?_

The site of Peter's tousled hair, glazed over dark eyes, and fairly broad shoulders weren't helping Jan's hormones either.

"Hell, yes." Before she knew it, Peter's lips had crashed down upon hers. It was rough, hard, and inexperienced, but Jan was equally inexperienced.

Jan's eyes went as round as saucers. _Oh my God! I'm kissing _Peter

She quickly pulled away, and both of them were gasping for breath.

Their mouths connected again. Their lips felt dry and they both flicked out their tongues at the same time. When their tongues met, it was sheer electricity. They gasped and pushed their tongues into each other's mouths. Peter pushed Jan up against the side of the closet.

"Seven minutes left!" Neither of them heard Lucy's voice this time as it was muffled out by their thud.

Jan broke the kiss, eliciting a confused moan from Peter. "Help me up," she gasped. She placed Peter's hands on the back of her knees, placed her own hands on Peter's shoulders, then jumped up to wrap her legs around Peter's waist. Peter instinctively took the hint, lifted her by the knees, and helped her wrap her legs around him. The battle of the tongues continued.

"Five minutes to go!"

Jan was starting to get heavy. Peter got down to his knees while her legs were still wrapped around him. They both groaned at the loss of pelvic contact. Jan pushed him down to the floor and continued making out with him while straddling him. Peter reached up to cup her small breasts and smiled at Jan's gasp turned moan.

"Two minutes!"

Peter broke the lip contact, at which Jan groaned. He quickly pushed Jan to the floor, rolled onto her, pulled her legs up over his hips again, grabbed her breasts again, and crashed his lips onto hers again. This time, it was Peter's turn to gasp and moan as Jan grabbed his ass with both hands. She pulled him in closer.

"And time's up!"

Lucy unlocked the doors and pulled them open, then gasped at the sight, as did her two friends. Lucy quickly threw the doors closed, locked them again, and put her back against the doors, trying her hardest to ignore the sounds coming from within. She quickly jumped away from the door with a shudder.

Elise mused in wonder. "Maybe I shouldn't have put in so much alcohol when spiking the punch."

No one else was paying attention to the game anymore. They had gotten bored after five minutes, knowing that nothing was happening in there.

Jan and Peter spent the rest of the party enjoying themselves in the coat closet, where none of the guests had hung up their coats or put away their shoes.

* * *

Monday at school, Lucy had tried to spread the news around Fillmore that Jan and Peter Brady had sex in the coat closet during her birthday party. She still wanted to ruin the Brady reputation. Her friends had backed out this time. Elise still felt guilty about spiking the punch. She remembered seeing a glass in each of their hands constantly, so they must have been drunk. Lisa was also feeling guilty. Her plan had led to this. Besides, she was too smart to admit her involvement publicly. 

No one in the school believed her. None of the other guests had heard any weird noises in the front hall, so they wouldn't play witness. Margie didn't believe Lucy either, but she always ducked her head when passing Peter in the hallways. The concept of two 12-year-olds from a suburban family having sex was just too absurd. Especially since it was the Brady household they were talking about.

Finally, Jan approached Lucy and drawled, "Don't you think this has gone far enough? I know your party was boring, but do you really need to attempt to tarnish our reputations with an outrageous lie, simply to make your party **sound** exciting?"

Lucy just fumed silently, twirled on her heel, and stomped away with her fists clenched at her sides.

The bell rang, and everyone rushed off to classes. A hand suddenly pulled Jan into the janitor's closet in the midst of swarming students.

No one noticed the giggles coming from inside the janitor's closet as they entered their classrooms.

Ironically enough, Jan and Peter Brady had skipped family studies, where the topic of the day was family planning.

Will the fact come back to bite them in the butts? Right now, they didn't know.

And they honestly didn't care.


End file.
